Big Dick Jokes

A dirty humor archive of funny cock and penis jokes

Top 10 big dick jokes

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.

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My dick is so big, King Kong tried to climb it.

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My dick is so big, movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large, and My Dick.

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My dick is so big, my mother was in labor for three extra days.

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My dick is so big, I’m already fucking a girl tomorrow.

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.

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My dick is so big, I have to stand in the hall when I take a piss.

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My dick is so big, if I didn’t sleep on my side, planes would crash into it at night.

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My dick is so big, I’m it’s bitch.

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My dick is so big, Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free.

Random selection of big dick jokes

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My dick is so big, I have to pay property taxes on it.

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My dick has fiber optics.

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My dick is so big, it has a stunt double.

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My dick is so big it beat up the class bully in high school.

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My dick is so big, when I was in a porno, they had to release it on a 4 disc DVD box set.

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.

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My dick is so big, Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free.

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My dick is so big, I’m it’s bitch.

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My dick is so big, it has it’s own time zone – central dick time.

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My dick is slated to host the 2016 Summer Olympics.

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My dick is so big.. that when I got circumsized I got a 6 piece luggage set.

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My dick is so big, it’s worshipped as a Pagan God.

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My dick is so big, I left it at home.

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My dick is so big, Rolling Stone calls it The Fifth Beatle.

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My dick blows out the candles no matter who’s birthday it is.

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My Dick is so big it has a restictor plate

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My dick is so big; if it was a Pilgrim, it would’ve come to America on the Nina, the Pinta AND the Santa Maria.

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My dick is so big, hookers pay me.

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My dick is so big, it has feet.

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My dick is so big, my zipper is made by Bethlehem Steel.

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My dick is so big, it graduated a year ahead of me from high school.

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My dick is so big it has a restaurant on the top floor.

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My dick is so big when we go deer hunting I don’t need a treestand, also it can smell the deer coming from over 500 yards away, no matter which direction the wind is blowing!

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My dick is so big, FedEx won’t insure it.

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My dick is so big I have an overpass in my pants.

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My dick is so big, it wears longer pants than I do.

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My dick is so big it shows up on radar.

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My dick is so big, it was a Varsity starter in all three sports since Freshman year!

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My dick is so big, that when it’s Eastern Standard Time at the tip, it’s Central Mountain Time at my balls.

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My dick is so big, it has an opening act.

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My dick is so big, they had to use bolt cutters for my vasectomy.

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My dick contributed fifty thousand dollars to the Democratic National Committee.

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My dick is so big, it has a horizon.

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My dick is so big, movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large, and My Dick.

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My dick is so big, it is a source of employment.

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My dick is so big, Jimmy Hoffa is still hiding below it.

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My dick is so big it costs a fortune to heat.

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My dick is so big, there’s a sneaker named “Air My Dick

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My dick is so big, even after 101 jokes, its still pretty funny.

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My dick is so big, the DMV is requiring me to obtain a Class B license.

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