Big Dick Jokes

A dirty humor archive of funny cock and penis jokes

Top 10 big dick jokes

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.

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My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick.

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My dick is so big, I have to stand in the hall when I take a piss.

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My dick is so big, my bed is equipped with airbags.

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My dick is so big it has a really good beach and several ok ones.

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My dick is so big, I can shoot for the Moon.

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My dick is so big, I have to bus in day laborers just to fidgit with my balls.

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My dick is so big, it seats six.

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My dick is so big, I’m already banging my next girlfriend’s best friend.

Random selection of big dick jokes

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My dick is so big, it’s right behind you.

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My dick is so big I can only fly on cargo planes.

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My dick is so big, I have to bus in day laborers just to fidgit with my balls.

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My dick is so big, sometimes it jerks me off.

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My dick is so big, there’s a sneaker named “Air My Dick

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My dick is so big…. I can use it for a speedbump in my parking lot!

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My dick is so big, the DMV is requiring me to obtain a Class B license.

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My dick is so big,it takes 1 ½ miles to make a 90 degree turn.

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My dick is so big, Michael Jackson wants to build an amusement park on it.

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My dick is so big, it has a three-picture deal.

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My dick is so big it has a Day side and a Night side.

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My dick is so big that once I got it stuck in my zipper and didn’t even scream till I finally felt it two days later.

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.

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My dick is so big, you’re standing on it.

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My dick is so big, that it can think of far more big dick jokes than I can.

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My dick is so big, it’s on Google Maps, and they had to move satellites into higher orbit to photograph it.

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My dick is so big, the city was going to build a statue of it but they ran out of cement.

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My dick is so big it’s decided on a career in Law.

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My dick is so big, it’s a government scapegoat.

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My dick is so big, Trump owns it.

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My dick is so big, it was recently declared a Wilderness Preserve dedicated to the re-introduction of my dick into the wild.

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My dick is so big there are isolated tribes living on remote areas of it.

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My dick is so big, it could have invaded Iraq all by itself.

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My dick is so big that from the tip, everybody down there looks like teeny-tiny little ants.

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My dick is so big, it needs an airplane warning light.

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My dick is so big, it may’ve already been assimilated by the Borg.

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My dick is so big, it killed its ex-wife and got away with it scott free.

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My dick is so big, it has casters.

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My dick is so big, I left it at home.

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My dick is so big, I run three-legged races by myself.

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My dick is so big, its only natural that it would experience its fair share of cattle mutilations and ghost ships.

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My dick is so big, that when it’s Eastern Standard Time at the tip, it’s Central Mountain Time at my balls.

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My dick is so big, I use it to smuggle illegal immigrants across the border.

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My dick is so big, visitors at the zoo buy bags of peanuts to stuff up it.

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My dick is so big, I can sit on it.

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My dick is so big it needs those specially fitted orthopedic shoes.

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My dick is so big, when it rains the head of my dick doesn’t get wet.

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My dick is so big, Magellan only sailed halfway around it.

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My dick is so big you’d better just get the Cliff’s Notes version.

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My dick is so big, I was once in Ohio and got a blow job in Tennessee.

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