Big Dick Jokes

A dirty humor archive of funny cock and penis jokes

Top 10 big dick jokes

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.

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My dick is so big, King Kong tried to climb it.

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My dick is so big, movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large, and My Dick.

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My dick is so big, my mother was in labor for three extra days.

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My dick is so big, I’m already fucking a girl tomorrow.

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.

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My dick is so big, if I didn’t sleep on my side, planes would crash into it at night.

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My dick is so big, I have to stand in the hall when I take a piss.

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My dick is so big, I’m it’s bitch.

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My dick is so big, Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free.

Random selection of big dick jokes

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My dick is so big, at first I thought it was using steroids to bulk up, but then I saw my dick’s dick and IT WAS HUGE, TOO!

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My dick is so big that i had to buy a big jacked up pickup truck just to carry my ego….

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My dick is so big that its flight is impossible without the aid of rising thermal updrafts.

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My dick is so big, for prom night I rented the Oscar Meyer Wiener Wagon instead of a limo.

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My dick is so big, it takes four fat women and a team of Clydesdales to jack me off.

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My dick needs to double its springtime weight; packing on fat in order to survive the long winter ahead.

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My dick is so big, it won’t return Spielberg’s calls.

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My dick is so big it affects the tides.

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My dick is so big it costs a fortune to heat.

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My dick is so big, Steve Irwin once lasso’d it with a top-jaw rope.

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My dick is so big, I can shoot for the Moon.

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.

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My dick is the only line drawing on the Nazca Plain in Peru that you can really see from space.

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My dick is so big you can ski down it.

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My dick is so big there’s a My Dick Rescue Team stationed on it.

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my Dick is So big it cums sperm whales

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My dick is so big, its got OnStar.

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My dick is so big, premature ejaculation takes ninety minutes.

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My dick is so big, you can get lost on it and wander for days.

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My dick is so big it needs those specially fitted orthopedic shoes.

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My dick is so big, when it rains the head of my dick doesn’t get wet.

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My dick is so big I can only fly on cargo planes.

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My dick is so big it produces its own local weather.

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My dick is so big the Titanic ran into it and sank.

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My dick is so big, when I get aroused, the Earth develops an elliptical orbit.

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My dick is so big that if I accidentally trip over it, it takes 2-3 days just to hit the ground.

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My dick is so big, it will stubbornly drive around for hours-TOTALLY LOST-and never once stop to ask for directions.

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My dick is so big, I have to pay property taxes on it.

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My dick is so big, the city was going to build a statue of it but they ran out of cement.

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My dick is so big it subconsciously ducks its head just a little bit every time I walk thru a doorway.

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My dick is so big, novice divers should be reminded to pressure-equalize their ears several times on the way down.

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My dick is so big, I painted the foreskin red, white, and blue and used it as a flag.

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My dick is so big, it has casters.

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My dick is so big, interplanetary distances are measured in light years and my dick years.

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My dick is so big, it has tonsils.

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My dick is so big, it has its own gravity

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My dick is so big it periodically sheds its skin. Got enough last month to make a pair of motorcycle boots, three wallets and this belt.

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My dick has better credit than I do.

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My dick is so big it could’ve fed the entire Donner Party-for two winters!

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My dick is so big it doesn’t ship to AK or HI.

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