

(
+63 rating,
327 votes)

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.


(
+26 rating,
90 votes)

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My dick is so big, King Kong tried to climb it.


(
+21 rating,
73 votes)

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My dick is so big, movie theaters now serve popcorn in small, medium, large, and My Dick.


(
+15 rating,
45 votes)

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My dick is so big, my mother was in labor for three extra days.


(
+14 rating,
32 votes)

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My dick is so big, I’m already fucking a girl tomorrow.


(
+13 rating,
73 votes)

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.


(
+8 rating,
48 votes)

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My dick is so big, I have to stand in the hall when I take a piss.


(
+8 rating,
22 votes)

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My dick is so big, I’m it’s bitch.


(
+5 rating,
19 votes)

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My dick is so big, Las Vegas casinos fly it into town for free.


(
+5 rating,
15 votes)

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My dick is so big, if I didn’t sleep on my side, planes would crash into it at night.
Random selection of big dick jokes


(
+63 rating,
327 votes)

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.


(
0 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big that if I accidentally trip over it, it takes 2-3 days just to hit the ground.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, I went to The Viper Room and my dick got right in. I had to stand and argue with the doorman.


(
-1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, it’s in a boy band with four other big dicks.


(
0 rating,
6 votes)

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My dick is so big, that it has its own dick. And even my dick’s dick is bigger than your dick.


(
0 rating,
4 votes)

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My dick is so big, it might attract an IRS tax audit.


(
-2 rating,
4 votes)

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My dick can look directly into a second-story window. Flat-footed.


(
+3 rating,
5 votes)

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My dick is so big, it has a retractable dome.


(
-2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, I left it at home.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big there’s a My Dick Rescue Team stationed on it.


(
-1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, all the smaller dicks roll over, showing their bellies in submission.


(
0 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big it produces its own local weather.


(
-2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick requires backcountry permits for all overnight hikes.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big it has Yosemite Sam mudflaps.


(
-3 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, they named the invasion of Normandy after it. (usually just known as D day)


(
-1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, compasses do not function properly around it.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, my home address is 1257 My Dick.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big that from the tip, everybody down there looks like teeny-tiny little ants.


(
+26 rating,
90 votes)

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My dick is so big, King Kong tried to climb it.


(
0 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, no matter where I go, my dick always gets there first.


(
+2 rating,
22 votes)

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My dick is so big, it has its own gravity


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so long, it enters a room five seconds before I do.


(
0 rating,
6 votes)

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My dick is so big, it has its own moon.


(
-2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, it will stubbornly drive around for hours-TOTALLY LOST-and never once stop to ask for directions.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big.. that when I got circumsized I got a 6 piece luggage set.


(
-1 rating,
5 votes)

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My dick’s so big; in the playground, it could either teeter OR totter-but never reallly teeter-totter.


(
0 rating,
4 votes)

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My dick is so big, penthouse guests have reported there’s a noticeable sway on windy days.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, it has an opening act.


(
-2 rating,
4 votes)

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My dick has an old rusty harpoon stuck in it.


(
+3 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, that right now it’s in the other room fixing us drinks.


(
+1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, it’s on Google Maps, and they had to move satellites into higher orbit to photograph it.


(
-2 rating,
4 votes)

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My dick is so big that i had to buy a big jacked up pickup truck just to carry my ego….


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big it doesn’t need a resume, a nice suit or a firm handshake to get the job.


(
0 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, whenever there’s a report of a huge dick jam, it’ll usually be the dick at fault.


(
+1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, my zipper is made by Bethlehem Steel.


(
+3 rating,
5 votes)

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My dick is recommended by four out of five dentists, AND their patients who chew my dick.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, while I’m eating peanuts way back in Coach, he’s up in the big chair, talking to the tower; getting clearance to land; flying the plane.


(
0 rating,
4 votes)

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My dick is so big; if it was a Pilgrim, it would’ve come to America on the Nina, the Pinta AND the Santa Maria.


(
-3 rating,
7 votes)

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My dick is so big it has cable.


(
0 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big it’s decided on a career in Law.