

(
+22 rating,
68 votes)

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My dick is so big, Frodo carried the Ring to it.


(
+3 rating,
15 votes)

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My dick hit .370 in the minors before it hurt its knee.


(
+3 rating,
7 votes)

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My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick.


(
+3 rating,
7 votes)

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My dick is so big, I have to stand in the hall when I take a piss.


(
+3 rating,
5 votes)

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My dick is so big, my bed is equipped with airbags.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big it has a really good beach and several ok ones.


(
+2 rating,
2 votes)

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My dick is so big, I can shoot for the Moon.


(
+1 rating,
7 votes)

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My dick is so big, I have to bus in day laborers just to fidgit with my balls.


(
+1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, it seats six.


(
+1 rating,
3 votes)

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My dick is so big, I’m already banging my next girlfriend’s best friend.
Random selection of big dick jokes


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, the Pope has blessed it.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, I’ve had to resort to hiring out-of-state hookers.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, I use a hula hoop as a cock ring.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, they won’t let it ride ANY of the ‘coasters at Six Flags.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big it’s listed on the New York Stock Exchange.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, the DMV is requiring me to obtain a Class B license.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, students will need a calculator with scientific notation.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, it needs an airplane warning light.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big that Verizon’s leasing space at the tip for a cellphone tower.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, when it rains the head of my dick doesn’t get wet.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, Florida had to measure it twice.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, it’s carved on Mt. Rushmore next to Lincoln.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick needs to double its springtime weight; packing on fat in order to survive the long winter ahead.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, I can never sit in the front row.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big that there’re currently a bunch of biologists filming a documentary on its untamed inhabitants.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, it might attract an IRS tax audit.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big it’s decided on a career in Law.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick golfs with the mayor.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big that if I accidentally trip over it, it takes 2-3 days just to hit the ground.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, they had to use bolt cutters for my vasectomy.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big it beat up the class bully in high school.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, it only plays arenas.


(
+1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, it has an agent. My dick’s people will call your people. Let’s have lunch with my dick.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, compasses do not function properly around it.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, it could have invaded Iraq all by itself.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big they’ve had to divide up the compass with, North, South, East, West and My Dick.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, that I look like its dick in front of it!


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, I have to cook it breakfast in the mornings.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, I have to pay property taxes on it.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick can be used as a flotation device in the highly unlikely event of a water landing.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, I have to use an elastic zipper.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big that European pranksters show up every night; stomping around all over it making fake crop circles.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big its become aloof; maintaining just a nodding acquintance with my balls, and won’t even speak to my asshole anymore.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big I have an overpass in my pants.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, it could feed Ethiopia for a month.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big, my first orgasm caused the Big Bang.


(
+3 rating,
7 votes)

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My dick is so big, there was once a movie called Godzilla vs. My Dick.


(
-1 rating,
1 votes)

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My dick is so big, it has a basement.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big it can’t take the Panama Canal, but must sail all the way around the tip of South America.


(No Ratings Yet)

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My dick is so big that the head of it has only seen my balls in pictures.